A child is a father of man. So, they say. In their nascent intelligence and various types of analogies the children draw while learning the ways of fending for themselves in this world, there occurs instances and events that will make you laugh. Some of such moments have been captured here.


A mother complained to her doctor about her daughters strange eating habits.
"All day long she lies in bed and eats yeast and car wax. What will happen to her?"

Eventually" said the Doctor, "she will rise and shine!"
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A troop of Boy Scouts was being used as "Guinea pigs" in a test of emergency systems.

A mock earthquake was staged, and the Scouts impersonated wounded persons who were to be picked up and cared for by the emergency units.

One Scout was supposed to lie on the ground and await his rescuers, but the first-aid people got behind schedule, and the Scout lay "wounded" for several hours.

When the first-aid squad arrived where the casualty was supposed to be, they found nothing but this brief note:
"Have bled to death and gone home."
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A Sunday School teacher of pre-schoolers was concerned that his students might be a little confused about Jesus Christ because of the Christmas season emphasis on His birth. He wanted to make sure they understood that the birth of Jesus occurred for real.
He asked his class, "Where is Jesus today?"
Steven raised his hand and said, "He's in heaven."
Mary was called on and answered, "He's in my heart."
Little Johnny, waving his hand furiously, blurted out, "I know, I know! He's in our bathroom!!!"
The whole class got very quiet, looked at the teacher, and waited for a response. The teacher was completely at a loss for a few very long seconds.
Finally, he gathered his wits and asked Little Johnny how he knew this.
Little Johnny said, "Well...every morning, my father gets up, bangs on the bathroom door, and yells, "Good Lord, are you still in there?!"
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When I stopped the bus to pick up Chris for preschool, I noticed an older woman hugging him as he left the house.

"Is that your grandmother?" I asked.

"Yes," Chris said. "She's come to visit us for Christmas."

"How nice," I said. "Where does she live?"

"At the airport," Chris replied. "Whenever we want her, we just go out there and get her."
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The composition teacher asked the class to write about an unusual event that happened during the past week. Little Johnny got up and read his essay.
It began, "Daddy fell into the well last week..."
"My goodness!" the teacher exclaimed. "Is he all right?"
"He must be," said the boy. "He stopped yelling for help yesterday."
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The little boy was sitting on a park bench munching on one chocolate bar after another.

After the 6th one a man on the bench across from him said, "Son, you know eating all those chocolates isn't good for you. It will give you acne, rot your teeth, make you fat."

The boy replied, "My grandfather lived to be 107 years old."

The man asked, "Did your grandfather eat 6 chocolate bars at a time?"

The little boy answered, "No, he minded his own damn business!"
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