Jokes on the relationship of husband and wife are more hilarious. Here are some of such jokes that can get you turned on in case you are getting bored.


Married 25 years, I took a look at my wife one day and said, "Honey, 25 years ago, we had a cheap apartment, a cheap car, slept on a sofa bed and watched a 10 inch black and white TV, but I got to sleep every night with a hot 25 year old blond. Now, we have a nice house, nice car, big bed and plasma screen TV, but I'm sleeping with a 50 year old woman. It seems to me that you are not holding up your side of things."

My wife is a very reasonable woman. She told me to go out and find a hot 25 year old blond, and she would make sure that I would once again be living in a cheap apartment, driving a cheap car, sleeping on a sofa bed."
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A woman finds Aladdin's magic lamp. She starts rubbing it and a Genie comes out as usual. The woman looks at the Genie and asks him to grant her wishes:

- I want my husband to have eyes only for me.

- I want to be the only one in his life.

- I want him to sleep always by my side.

- I want that when he gets up in the morning I'm the first thing he grabs and takes me everywhere he goes.

The Genie turned her into a Smart Phone....!!!
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An older, tired-looking dog wandered into my yard.

I could tell from his collar and well-fed belly that he had a home and was well taken care of.


He calmly came over to me, I gave him a few pats on his head. He then followed me into my house, slowly walked down the hall, curled up in the corner and fell asleep.


An hour later, he went to the door, and I let him out.


The next day he was back, greeted me in my yard, walked
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One evening a husband comes home to his apartment very roughed up.

When his wife sees him she asks, "What happened to you?"

"I got into a fight with the apartment manager."

"Whatever for?"
"He said he had slept with every woman in the complex except one!"

The woman replied, "I bet it's that snooty Mrs. Smith on the third floor."
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This 89 year old woman was arrested for lifting.

When she went before the judge he asked her, "What did you steal?"

She replied, "Can of peaches."

The judge asked her why she had stolen the can of peaches and she replied that she was hungry. Then the judge asked her how many peaches were in the can. She replied 6.

The judge said, "Then I will give you 6 days in jail."

Before the judge could actually pronounce the punishment, the woman's husband spoke up and asked, the judge if he could say something on his wife's behalf.
The judge said, "What is it?"

The husband said, "She also stole a can of peas."
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My Dearest Susan,
Sweetie of my heart. I've been so desolate ever since I broke off our engagement. Simply devastated. Won't you please consider coming back to me?

You hold a place in my heart no other woman can fill. I can never marry another woman quite like you.

I need you so much. Won't you forgive me and let us make a new beginning? I love you so.

Yours always and truly,
George

P.S. Congratulations on you winning the state lottery.
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