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A couple trying to break into society, hosted a dinner party. As the guests were enjoying their dinner salad, the maid called the hostess from the table. The maid informed her that the cat had climbed on the kitchen table and eaten a large portion of the salmon's mid- section.
The hostess decided to fill the eaten portion with some canned salmon and other camouflage. As the guests were enjoying the fish, the maid called the hostess into the kitchen and announced while wringing her hands, "Madam, the cat is dead."
The hostess and her husband informed the guests and suggested it might be best if everyone went to the hospital and had their stomachs pumped. Returning home, the couple asked the maid where she had put the cat.
"It is still out on the road where the car ran over it."
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In an Anglican church, each service begins with a greeting.

The officiating clergyman says, "The Lord be with you."

The congregation used to respond by saying, "And with thy spirit."

But, with the modernizing of the liturgy, the minister now says, "The Lord be with you," and everyone responds with, "And also with you."

One Sunday a visiting bishop went to a church where the sound system was known to be old and unreliable.

As he approached the microphone, he tapped it several times and finally said, "There's something wrong with this!"

Without hesitation, the whole congregation answered faithfully, "And also with you."
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A man walked into a bar on a slow night and sat down. After a few minutes, the bartender asked him if he wanted a drink, and he said, "No thanks, I don't drink, I tried it once but I didn't like it!"

So the bartender said, "Well would you like a cigarette?"

The man said, "No, I don't smoke, I tried it once but I didn't like it!"

The bartender asked him if he'd like to play a game of pool, and again the man said, "No I don't like pool, I tried it once but I didn't like it."

"As a matter of fact I wouldn't be here at all, but I'm waiting on my son!"

The bartender said, "Your only son I presume!!"
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After directory assistance gave Anita, her boyfriend's new telephone number, she dialed him and got a woman.

"Is Jimmy there?" Anita asked.

"He's in the shower," she responded.

"Please tell him his girlfriend called," Anita said and hung up.

When he didn't return the call, Anita dialed again. This time a man answered.

"This is Jimmy," he said.

"You're not my boyfriend!" Anita exclaimed.

"I know," he replied. "That's what I've been trying to tell my wife for the past half-hour."
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A major traffic jam was preventing people from moving forward.
A motorist shouted out wanting to know what was happening.
A guy from the front replied, "Well at the traffic crossing Laloo Yadav is sprawled across the road.
He is refusing to move from there!"
"But why?"
"He has lost the elections and will now surely be convicted for corruption and will have to pay lakhs of Rupess as fines!
He is threatening to douse himself with kerosene and set himself on fire if people didn't contribute with money to help him pay the fine!"
"So how much has been collected so far?"
"Six litres!"
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Excerpts taken from court proceedings that's really silly and funny too. These are actually things people actually said in court, word for word, taken down and now published by court reporters who had the torment of staying calm while these exchanges were actually taking place.

Q : What gear were you in, at the moment of impact?
A : Gucci sweats and Reebok!

Q : This myasthenia gravis, does it effect your memory at all?
A : Yes.
Q : And in what
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More Articles ...

  1. The Toilet Brush
  2. Wrong train
  3. On and off !!!

Sardarji Article Count: 1049

Political Article Count: 73

Women Article Count: 22

Thief Article Count: 18

Professor Article Count: 8

General Article Count: 1988

Non-Veg Jokes Article Count: 24

Kids Article Count: 413

Bollywood Article Count: 9

Doctor Patient Article Count: 289

Husband-Wife Article Count: 789

Religion Article Count: 173

Lawyers Article Count: 147

Blondes Article Count: 126

Bar Article Count: 127

Animal Kingdom Article Count: 70

Communities Article Count: 67

Sports Article Count: 80

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