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An extremely modest man was in the hospital for a series of tests, the last of which had left his bodily systems extremely upset.
Upon making several false alarm trips to the bathroom, he figured that the latest episode was just that, so he stayed put.
Suddenly, however, he filled his bed with diarrhea and was embarrassed beyond his ability to remain rational. In a complete loss of composure, he jumped out of bed, gathered up the bed sheets, and threw them out the hospital
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Santa goes to a proctologist to complain about a rectal disorder.

The doctor examines him, tells him he needs an enema, gives him the necessary medication for the enema, and asks him to come back the following week for a checkup.

Upon returning the next week, Santa complains that the medication did nothing for him.

"Did you use the medication properly?" asks the doctor.

"Of course I did, Doc! Jeez, what do you think, I shoved it up my ass?!"
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A pastor at a frontier church ended a stirring sermon with, "All those who want to go to heaven, put up your hands!"
Everybody enthusiastically raised their hands ... everybody except a grizzled old cowboy who had been slouching against the doorpost at the back of the room.
All heads turned as he sauntered up to the front, spurs jangling and said, "Preacher, that was too easy. How do you know if these folks are serious? I can guarantee to prove who really means it and who don't!"
Bemused and not a little frightenened the preacher said, "Ok, my friend, go ahead and put the faith of these good people to the test. Ask them anything you want."
At that the cowboy pulled his pistol, turned to the audience and said, "Alright ... who wants to go heaven ... raise your hands!"
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Worried that his son was spending too much money on dates, Little Johnny's Father asked how much his last date had cost.

Little Johnny calculated a minute then replied, "Oh, about $15 or so I think."

"Well," said his Father, "I'm proud of you for finally coming up with an inexpensive evening."

"To be honest Dad," Little Johnny went on, "we'd have done more, but that was all the money she had."
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Dear Manager,
Thank you for your letter of April 25th. After careful consideration, I regret to inform you that I am unable to accept your refusal to offer me a position in your company.
This year I have been particularly fortunate in receiving an unusually large number of rejection letters. With such a varied and promising field of candidates, it is impossible for me to accept all refusals.
Despite your companies outstanding qualifications and previous experience in rejecting applicants, I find that your rejection does not meet my needs at this time. Therefore, I will assume the position in your department this August.

I look forward to seeing you then.
Best of luck in rejecting future applicants.

Sincerely,
Interviewee
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An older gentleman was on the operating table awaiting surgery and he insisted that his son, a renowned surgeon, perform the operation.

As he was about to get the anesthesia he asked to speak to his son.

"Yes Dad, what is it?"

"Don't be nervous, son; do your best and just remember, if it doesn't go well, if something happens to me... your mother is going to come and live with you and your wife."
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More Articles ...

  1. Skinny Dipping
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Sardarji Article Count: 1049

Political Article Count: 73

Women Article Count: 22

Thief Article Count: 18

Professor Article Count: 8

General Article Count: 1988

Non-Veg Jokes Article Count: 24

Kids Article Count: 413

Bollywood Article Count: 9

Doctor Patient Article Count: 289

Husband-Wife Article Count: 789

Religion Article Count: 173

Lawyers Article Count: 147

Blondes Article Count: 126

Bar Article Count: 127

Animal Kingdom Article Count: 70

Communities Article Count: 67

Sports Article Count: 80

Techies Article Count: 66

Celebrities Article Count: 42

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