Jokes on the relationship of husband and wife are more hilarious. Here are some of such jokes that can get you turned on in case you are getting bored.


A man is out walking his dog one day when it slips the leash and runs away.

As the man is chasing him down the street, the dog runs into a yard and bites the lady that lives there.

The woman rushes into the house and sends her husband out to deal with the man and his dog.

The dog owner is beside himself with worry as the husband approaches, and says, "Sir, how about a settlement. Would one thousand rupees do?"

The husband pauses for a moment and replies, "Sure, and if you come around next week, it's worth another one thousand."
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A married lady, visited her elderly parents' home.

When she opened refrigerator, she was shocked to see inside a picture of a lovely, slender, perfectly built young woman in two-piece bikini.

Lady: Mom, what's this?

Mom: Oh, I put that up there to remind me not to overeat.

Lady: Is it working?

Mom: Yes and No.

I've lost 8 kilos, but your dad has gained 20...!!!
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Not long after his marriage, Joe and his father, met for lunch. "Well, son," asked the father, "how is married life treating you?"

"Not very well, I'm afraid," sighed Joe. "It seems I married a nun."

"A nun?" his father questioned.

"That's right," moaned Joe. "None in the morning, none at night, and none at all unless I beg!"

Joe's father nodded knowingly and slapped his boy on the back a couple of times.

"Why don't we all get together for dinner tonight and have a nice talk?"

Joe smiled, "Say, Dad, that's a great idea!"

"Fine," replied the father, "I'll call home and tell the Mother Superior to set two extra plates."
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At my granddaughter's wedding, the DJ polled the guests to see who had been married longest.

It turned out to be my husband and I.

The DJ asked us, "What advice would you give to the newly-married couple?"

I said, "The three most important words in a marriage are, 'You're probably right.'"

Everyone then looked at my husband.

He said, "She's probably right."
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A group of young women decided to arrange for a camp with their mothers-in-law to hopefully get to know and understand each other better.

Two buses were hired, one for the mothers -in-law and the other for the daughters-in- law.

Unfortunately the bus with the mothers-in-law was involved in an accident and all the passengers died on the spot.

The daughters in law (women being women) shed a few tears but they were all puzzled by one sister who wailed uncontrollably for what they perceived to be her loss.

Her friend asked her, "Forgive me for asking but why are you crying so hard, I didn't realize u were so close to your mother-in-law?"

To which she replied, "No we are not close at all, she missed the bus!"
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A man in Scotland calls his son in London the day before Christmas Eve and says, "I hate to ruin your day but I have to tell you that your mother and I are divorcing; forty-five years of misery is enough."

"Dad, what are you talking about?" the son screams.

"We can't stand the sight of each other any longer", the father says. "We're sick of each other and I'm sick of talking about this, so you call your sister in Leeds and tell her."

Frantically
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