Banta was quite inventive and was always trying out new things. One day he thought he'd see just how fast a bicycle could go before it became uncontrollable. He asked his friend, who owned an old Maruti, if he could tie his bike to the bumper of his car to test his theory. His friend said, "Sure." So Banta tied his bike to the back of the car and said to his friend, "I'll ring my bike bell once if I want you to go faster, twice if I want you maintain speed, and repeatedly
The blonde college girl was supposed to write a short story in as few words as possible for her English class and the instructions were that it had to include Religion, Sexuality and Mystery.
She was the only one who received an A+. This is what she wrote:
One day 3 brothers are walking around the part when they came across something in the middle of their path 'it looks like SHlT!' said the first brother 'i better check it out' he lean forward and took a deep breath 'Smells like SHlT!' he said. The second brother walk closer and stick his finger inside it and feel 'Feels like SHlT' he said . The thirth brother poke it and put it inside his mouth and said 'Taste like SHlT' the three brother finally relaxed and said 'GOOD thing we didn't step on it PHEW!'
A Third grade teacher collected well known proverbs. He gave each kid in the class the first half of the proverb, and asked them to come up with the rest. Here is what the kids came up with: Love all, trust ... me. No news is ... impossible. Strike while the ... bug is close. A miss is as good as a ... Mrs. A penny saved is ... not much. Don't bite the hand that ... looks dirty. You can't teach an old dog ... math. None are so blind as
At a party, the host was getting worried because there were too many people and not enough refreshments. She was sure that not all of these had been invited but didn't know how to tell which ones were the crashers.
Then her husband got an idea. He turned to the crowd of the guests and said, "Will everyone from the bride's side of the family stand up please?" About 20 people stood.
Then he asked, "Will everyone from the groom's side of the family stand up please?"
About 25 people stood up.
Then he smiled and said, "Will everyone who stood please LEAVE... This is a 'Birthday Party'!!!"