Inspector: What is her height? Man: I never noticed.
Inspector: Slim or healthy? Man: Not slim, can be healthy
Inspector: Colour of the eyes? Man: Never noticed
Inspector: Colour of hair? Man: Changes according to season.
Inspector: What was she wearing? Man: Saree/suit. I don't remember exactly.
Inspector: Was somebody with her??? Man: Yes, my Labrador dog, Romeo, tied with a golden chain, height 30 inches, healthy, brown eyes, blackish brown hair, his left foot thumb nail is slightly broken, wearing a golden belt studded with blue balls, he likes non-veg. food, we eat together, we jog together... And the man started crying....
A taxi passenger tapped the driver on the shoulder to ask him a question.
The driver screamed, lost control of the car, nearly hit a bus, went up on the footpath, and stopped centimeters from a shop window.
For a second everything went quiet in the cab, then the driver said: "Look mate, don't ever do that again. You scared the daylights out of me!"
The passenger apologized and said, "I didn't realize that a little tap would scare you so much."
The driver replied, "Sorry, it's not really your fault. Today is my first day as a cab driver - I've been driving a van carrying dead Bodies for the last 25 years.....
A Greek moved to New Zealand and wants to buy a farm.
The New Zealander says he will show the Greek around.
While walking around the New Zealander sees a sheep with its head stuck in the fence, he goes, oh goodie. He pulls his pants down and starts giving it to the sheep.
When he was finished, he pulls his pants up looks at the Greek and says, "Your turn."
The Greek says, "Oh goodie!!!"
The Greek pulls the sheep out of the fence and pulls his pants down and puts his head in the fence with his bum up in the air...
The wives of two politicians(Santa & Banta) were having a bitter quarrel. 'Your husband is corrupt and foolish. He was caught red-handed accepting the bribe.' 'Absolute bakwaas,' yelled back the other. 'And who are you to talk! There is an enquiry going on against your husband as well.' 'Sure! But the enquiry against my husband is being conducted by a first class Magistrate. The enquiry against your husband is being carried out by a retired government servant.'
Sachin received a parrot for his birthday. This parrot was fully grown with a bad attitude and worse vocabulary. Every other word was an expletive. Those that weren't expletives were, to say the least, rude. Sachin tried hard to change the bird's attitude and was constantly saying polite words, playing soft music, anything that came to mind. Nothing worked. He yelled at the bird, the bird got worse. He shook the bird and the bird got madder and ruder. Finally, in a moment