The blonde college girl was supposed to write a short story in as few words as possible for her English class and the instructions were that it had to include Religion, Sexuality and Mystery.
She was the only one who received an A+. This is what she wrote:
A blonde brought her baby to a doctor. After examining, the doctor right away determined that the baby had an earache. He wrote a prescription for eardrops.
In the directions he wrote, "Put two drops in right ear every four hours" and he abbreviated "right" as an R with a circle around it.
Several days passed, and the blonde returned with her baby, complaining that the baby still had an earache, and his little behind was getting really greasy with all those drops of oil.
The doctor looked at the bottle of eardrops and sure enough, the pharmacist had typed the following instructions on the label:
There was a blonde woman at a soda machine. She put a dollar in the slot and pushed the Pepsi button. The Pepsi came out, so she took it and put the change in her purse.
She took another dollar out, put it in the machine, and pressed the Mountain Dew button. The Mountain Dew came out, and she took the change and put it in her purse.
Meanwhile, a big line was forming behind her, but she kept taking her money out, putting it in the machine, and pressing buttons.
Someone in the line finally said, "Come on, lady! What's taking you so long?"
A blonde gets a job as a physical education teacher for 16 - 18 year olds.
She notices a boy at the end of the field standing alone, while all the other kids are running around having fun, kicking a football. She takes pity on him and decides to speak to him.
"Are you ok?" she asks.
"Yes," he replies. "You can go and play with the other kids, you know," she says.
"It's best I stay here," he says.
"Why's that, sweetie?" asks the blonde.
The boy looks at her incredulously and says, "Because I'm the GOAL KEEPER !"
A blonde asked a farmer, "Why doesn't this cow have any horns?"
The farmer cocked his head for a moment, then began in a patient tone, "Well, cattle can do a lot of damage with horns. Sometimes we keep them trimmed down. Still, there are some breeds of cattle that never grow horns. But the reason this cow doesn't have horns is because it's a horse."