In the life of a common man, things are never serious. Starting from birth until the common man dies, everything remains so so common that you can make fun of almost everything. Some of such jokes can be found here.


Two Scotsmen had been pals since childhood and had shared everything over the years. One day, Angus won a rare bottle of Scotch in a door prize.

Immediately, Jock says, "Open it up and we'll have a dram."

"Naw, ah'm goin' tae save it for a special occasion."

Birthdays came and went, his anniversaries came and went, but Jock could never get Angus to open the bottle.

Finally Angus had a heart attack, and was laying on his deathbed. He
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A picky customer comes to a small food shop and sees a new delivery of fresh fruit.

"Give me three dozens of oranges and wrap every orange up in a separate piece of paper, please," he says to the saleswoman.

She does.

"And three dozens of cherries, please, and wrap up every one in a separate piece of paper, too." She does.

"And what is that there," he asks pointing out a bushel in the corner.

"Grapes," says the saleswoman, "but they are not for sale!"
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The homeowner was delighted with the way the painter had done all the work on his house.

"You did a great job," he said and handed the man a check. "Also, in order to thank you, here's an extra $80 to take the missus out to dinner and a movie."

The painter thanked him and agreed to do that. Later that night, the doorbell rang and it was the painter.

Thinking the man had forgotten something he asked, "What's the matter, did you forget something?"

"Nope," replied the painter. "I'm a man of my word. I'm here to take your missus out to dinner and a movie like you asked."
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A pirate walked into a bar and the bartender said, "Hey, I haven't seen you in a while. What happened, you look terrible!"

"What do you mean? I'm fine."

"What about that wooden leg? You didn't have that before."

"Well," said the pirate, "We were in a battle at sea and a cannon ball hit my leg but the Doc fixed me up, and I'm fine, really."

"Oh yeah? Well what about that hook? The last time I saw you, you had both hands."

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A 54 year old woman had a heart attack and was taken to the hospital. While on the operating table she had a near death experience.

Seeing God she Asked, "Is my time up?"

God said, "No, you have another 43 years, 2 months and 8 days to live."

Upon recovery, the woman decided to stay in the hospital and have a face-lift, liposuction, breast implants and a tummy tuck. She even had someone come in and change her hair colour and brighten her teeth
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A guy was known among his friends to be very brief and to the point - he really never said too much. One day, a saleswoman knocked on his door and asked to see his wife, so the guy told her that she wasn't home.

"Well," the woman said, "could I please wait for her?"

The man directed her to the drawing room and left her there for more than three hours.

After feeling really worried, she called out for him an asked, "May I ask where your wife is?"

"She went to the cemetery," he replied.

"And when is she coming back?"

"I don't really know," he said. "She's been there eleven years now!"
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  1. A Little Late!
  2. A Letter to God
  3. A Lesson in Logic!
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