Sardarji, jokes punjabi

Get all the latest Sardarji jokes in one place.


Santa buys a ticket and wins the lottery. He goes to claim it and the man verifies his ticket number.
Santa says, "I want my 10 million."
The man replied, "No, sir. It doesn't work that way. We give you a million today and then you'll get the rest spread out for the next 9 years."
Santa said, "Oh, no. I want all my money right now! I won it and I want it."
Again, the man explain that he would only get a million that day and the rest during the next 9 years.
Santa, furious with the man, screams out, "Look, I want my money! If you're not going to give me my 10 million right now, then I want my Rs 100 back!"
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Santa reported for his university final examination, which consists of "Yes/No" type questions. He takes his seat in the examination hall, stares at the question paper for five minutes, and then in a fit of inspiration takes his purse out, removes a coin and starts tossing it, marking the answer sheet Yes for Heads and No for Tails.

Within half an hour he is all done whereas the rest of the class is sweating it out. During the last few minutes, he is seen desperately flipping the coin, muttering and sweating.

The moderator, alarmed, approaches his and asks what is going on.

Santa replies, "I'm rechecking my answers and I don't think I did very good."
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A drunk in a bar pukes all over his own shirt, which was brand new before he came in.

"Damn," he says. "I puked on my shirt again. If the wife finds out, she's gonna kill me."

"Not to worry," says the bartender as he sticks a $20 bill in the drunk's pocket. "Just tell her someone puked on you and gave you some cash to cover the cleaning bill."

So the drunk goes home and tells his wife about the guy who puked on him. She reaches into his pocket and finds two twenties.

"Why are there two twenties?" she asks.

The drunk replies, "Oh, yeah, he crapped in my pants, too."
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An old man goes to his doctor, complaining about a pain in his leg that doesn't heal, and wants a diagnosis and explanation.

The doctor checks out his leg, but can't find anything wrong, so he gives the old guy a full physical exam, and still can't come up with any possible explanation for the pain.

The doctor hands the patient his bill and says, "I'm sorry, but the pain in your leg is simply caused by old age; there's nothing I can do about it."

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The wives of two politicians(Santa & Banta) were having a bitter quarrel. 'Your husband is corrupt and foolish. He was caught red-handed accepting the bribe.'
'Absolute bakwaas,' yelled back the other. 'And who are you to talk! There is an enquiry going on against your husband as well.'
'Sure! But the enquiry against my husband is being conducted by a first class Magistrate. The enquiry against your husband is being carried out by a retired government servant.'
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Major Banta needed to use a pay phone, but didn't have change for Rs.10/- note. He saw Soldier Santa mopping the base's corridor floors, and asked him, 'Santar, do you have change for Rs.10/-?'
Soldier Santa replied, 'Sure. '
The Major Banta turned red. He said, 'That's no way to address a superior officer! Now let's try it again. Soldier, do you have change for a Rs.10/- note?'
Soldier Santa replied, 'No, SIR!'
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