Sardarji, jokes punjabi

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A circus owner walked into a bar to see everyone crowded about a table watching a little show.
On the table was an upside-down pot and a duck tap dancing on it. The circus owner was so impressed that he offered to buy the duck from its owner, Banta.
After some wheeling and dealing they settled for Rs 35,000 for the duck and the pot.
Three days later the circus owner runs back to the bar in anger, "Your duck is a rip-off! I put him on the pot before a whole audience and he didn't dance a single step!"
"Well," said Banta, "Did you remember to light a candle under the pot?"
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Santa and Banta were sitting in a bar getting really drunk. After a while, just drinking gets boring, so Santa looks at the Banta and says, "Hey, you want to go up for a ride in my airplane?"
Banta says, "Wow, you have an airplane? Let's go!"
So they get some more beer and go for a tour around the city in the plane. Eventually they get bored with this too, so they decide to land. The drunk Santa starts circling around looking for a place to land, and he sees an airstrip
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After a number of years in England Santa decided to visit his native village in Punjab. But he decided to spend a few days in Bombay and then a day in Delhi to pay homage in the Bangla Saheb Gurdwara near Connaught Place.

He landed in Bombay and friend received him. He enjoyed his sightseeing in Bombay and after a couple of days boarded a train for Delhi. He went into deep sleep in the train. This train reached Bhopal at about 8 a.m. Someone in the compartment put on
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The homeowner was delighted with the way Santa had done all the paintwork on his house.

"You did a great job," he said as he handed Santa his fees. "Also, in order to thank-you, here's an extra 500 bucks to take the wife out to dinner and a movie."

Santa declined, saying, "No, I can't accept that."

"I insist," said the man. "It would make me very happy if you do it."

"Well," said Santa reluctantly, but with appreciation, "If you really don't mind it, I'll do it."

Later that night, the doorbell rang and it was Santa, standing there in clean clothes, holding a bouquet of flowers.

Thinking that Santa had forgotten something he asked, "What's the matter, did you leave something behind?"

"Nope," replied Santa. "I'm just here to take the wife out to dinner and a movie like you asked."
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A woman went to the doctor's office. Where she was seen by one of the new doctors, but after about 4 minutes in the examination room, she burst out, screaming as she ran down the hall.

An older doctor stopped her and asked what the problem was, and she told him her story. After listening, he had her sit down and relax in another room.

The older doctor marched down the hallway back to where the first doctor was and demanded, "What's the matter with you? Mrs. Terry is 63 years old, she has four grown children and seven grandchildren, and you told her she was pregnant?"

The new doctor continued to write on his clipboard and without looking up said, "Does she still have the hiccups?
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Santa happened to participate in a competition, which was about writing the shortest story.
The organizers had put a condition that a story must have four ingredients viz. religion, sex, suspense and mystery.
When Santa's turn came after many attempts by others. Santa's story was of just one sentence which read "Oh god, my wife is going to deliver a child".
Ostensibly amused, the organizers asked the american whether it contained all the four ingredients! American replied affirmatively and gave his explanation as below:
Oh god: religion.
My wife: sex.
Going to deliver a child: suspense (whether a girl or a boy)
"Okay.... but where is the mystery?" asked one of the organizers.
Santa replied: who is the father?
He was the winner for writing the shortest story!
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