Dear Lord: So far I've done all right. I haven't gossipped, haven't lost my temper, haven't been greedy, grumpy, nasty, selfish, or overindulgent. I'm really glad about that.
But in a few minutes, God, I'm going to get out of bed. And from then on, I'm going to need a lot more help.
In a small town in the US, there is a rather sizable factory that hires only married men.
Concerned about this, a local woman called on the manager and asked him, "Why is it you limit your employees to married men? Is it because you think women are weak, dumb, cantankerous...or what?"
"Not at all, Ma'am," the manager replied. "It is because our employees are used to obeying orders, are accustomed to being shoved around, know how to keep their mouths shut and don't pout when I yell at them.
An American delegation on a visit to India were being shown round the capital. In the evening they were taken to the Secretariat for a panoramic view of Vijay Chowk and Rajpath. Came the closing hour and thousands upon thousands of clerks poured out of their offices. The place was crammed with bicycles and pedestrians.
'Who are all these people?' asked the leader of the American delegation.
'They are the common people of India; the real rulers of the country,' proudly replied the minister accompanying the visitors.
A few minutes later came a fleet of flag - bearing limousines escorted by pilots on motorcycles followed by jeeps full of armed policemen.
'And who are these?' asked the American.
'These are us,' replied the minister with the same pride, 'the servants of the people.'
Two attorneys boarded a flight out of Hongkong. One sat in the window seat, the other sat in the middle seat. Just before take-off, a physician got on and took the aisle seat next to the two attorneys. The physician kicked off his shoes, wiggled his toes and was settling in when the attorney in the window seat said, "I think I'll get up and get a coke." "No problem," said the physician, "I'll get it for you." While he was gone, one of the attorneys picked up the