Teacher asked her young students to get their parents to tell them a story with a moral at the end of it.
The next day, the kids came back and one by one, began to tell their stories. There were all the regular types of stuff. But then the teacher realised that only Little Johnny was left. "Johnny, do you have a story to share ?"
"Yes madam... My daddy told me a story about my Mom. She was a Marine pilot in Operation Desert Storm in Iraq and her plane
Banta and one of his friends were picked up by the cops for using drugs and appeared in court before the judge. The judge said, You seem like nice men, and Id like to give you a second chance rather than jail time. I want you to go out this weekend and try to show others the evils of drug use and get them to give up drugs forever. Ill see you back in court Monday. Monday, Banta and his friend were in court, and the judge said to the first one, How did you do over the
Outside a pharmacy in a busy street, a poor man is clutching onto a pole for dear life, not breathing, not moving, not twitching a muscle, just standing there, frozen. The pharmacist, seeing this strange sight in front of his shop, goes up to his assistant, Santa, and asks, "What's the matter with that guy? Wasn't he in here earlier?" Santa replies, "Yes he was. He had the most terrible cough and none of my prescriptions seemed to help." Pharmacist says, "He seems to be fine now." Santa replies, "Sure, he does. I gave him a box of the strongest laxatives [something that loosens the bowels. Used to combat constipation, overdose causes diarrhea] on the market. Now he won't dare cough!"
A car was involved in an accident in a street. As expected a large crowd gathered. A newspaper reporter eager to get his story could not get near the car. Being a clever sort, he started shouting loudly, "Let me through ! Let me through ! I am the son of the victim." The crowd made way for him. Lying in front of the car was a donkey.
A judge was instructing the jury that because a witness changed his statement after giving it to the police, he should not necessarily be regarded as untruthful.
"For example," the Judge said, "when I entered my chambers today, I was certain that I had my gold watch in my pocket. Then I remembered that I had left it on my nightstand in my bedroom."
When the Judge arrived home that evening, his wife asked, "Why so much urgency for your watch? Don't you think sending three men to pick it up for you was a bit extreme?"
"What?" exclaimed the Judge. "I didn't send anyone for my watch, let alone three people. What did you do?"
"I gave it to the first one," replied his wife, "he knew exactly where it was."
A few days before Christmas, a man enters a pet store looking for a unique gift for his wife. The store manager tells him, he has just what he's looking for! A beautiful parrot named Chet that sings Christmas carols. He brings the husband over to the colourful but quiet bird. The man agrees that Chet certainly is retty, but he doesn't seem to be much for singing. The manager tells him to watch as he reaches into his pocket and pulls out a lighter. The manager then clicks