Two Blondes were out hunting. They decided to separate to get a better chance of catching something.
The first blonde says to the other, "If you get lost, fire three shots into the air every hour. That way I can pinpoint you and find you."
After about three hours, the second blonde finds he is really lost. He decides to fire three shots into the air as the first man told him. He then waits for an hour and does it again. He repeats this until he is out of ammo.
The next morning, the first blonde finds the second with the help of forest rangers. He asks the second blonde if he did what he told him to do.
The blonde answers, "Yes, I fired three shots into the air every hour on the hour until I ran out of arrows."
He finds on one wall afully equipped bar with Guinness on tap. On the other wall is a dazzling array of the finest Cuban cigars. Then the priest comes in.
"Father, forgive me, for it's been a long time since I've been to confession, but I must first say that the confessional box is much more inviting these days."
The priest replies, "Get out! You're on my side!!!"
Husband: Darling!!! Tumhara Naam Haath Pe Likhu Ya Dil Pe?? Wife: Idhar Udhar Kyun Likhte Ho ? Agar Sachcha Pyar Karte Ho Toh Seedha Apne Property Ke Papers Pe Likho !!! Moral: Biwi Ke Saamne Style Nahin Maarnr Ka.
Prabhu... Yeh Kya Moh-Maya Hai? Apna Bachcha Roye, Toh Dil Mein Drd Hota Hai Aur Doosre Ka Roye, Toh Sir Mein! Apni Biwi Roye, Toh Sir Mein Dard Hota Hai Aur Doosre Ki Roye, Toh Dil Mein.... Sab Prabhu Ki Maya Hai.
A Man Praying in Kumbh Mela: Hey Prabhu, Nyaye Karo... Hey Prabhu, Nyaye Karo... Hamesha Bhai-Bhai Bichhadte Hain Is Kumbh Ke Mele Mein... Kabhi Pati-Patni Pe Bhi Try Karo!!!!
Wife: Jaanu, Kaash Aap Message Hote, Main Aapko Save Karti Aur Jab Dil Chahta Ta Padh Leti. Husband: Kanjoos Hee Rahiyo, Save Hee Karke Rakhiyo, Apni Kisi Saheli Ko Forward Na Kariyo!!!