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A fellow is going on a tour of a factory that produces various latex products. At the first stop, he's shown the machine that manufactures baby-bottle nipples. The machine makes a loud hiss-pop! noise.
"The hiss is the rubber being injected into the mold," explains the guide. "The popping sound is a needle poking a hole in the end of the nipple."
Later, the tour reaches the part of the factory where condoms are manufactured. The machine makes a noise: 'Hiss. Hiss. Hiss. Hiss-pop!'
"Wait a minute!" says the man taking the tour. "I understand what the 'hiss, hiss,' is, but what's that 'pop!' every so often?"
"Oh, it's just the same as in the baby-bottle nipple machine," says the guide. "It pokes a hole in every fourth condom."
"Well, that can't be good for the condoms!"
"Yeah, but it's great for the baby-bottle nipple business!"
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Banta, a furniture dealer from Ludhiana, decided to Expand the line of furniture in his store, so he decided to go to Chennai to see what he could find.

After arriving in Chennai he met with some manufacturers and selected a line that he thought would sell well Back home in Ludhiana.

To celebrate the new acquisition, he decided to visit a small bar and have a beer. As he sat enjoying his beer, he noticed that the small place was quite crowded, and that the
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Sir Winston Churchill was once asked about his position on whisky. Here's how he answered:

"If you mean whisky, the devil's brew, the poison scourge, the bloody monster that defiles innocence, dethrones reason, destroys the home, creates misery and poverty, yea, literally takes the bread from the mouths of little children;
if you mean that evil drink that topples men and women from the pinnacles of righteous and gracious living into the bottomless pit of degradation
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One day Banta walks into a dingy little storefront travel agency, holds up a page out of a newspaper, and says: "You say in this ad that you have a wonderful luxury cruise for only Rs 5000. I want to go on this wonderful luxury cruise."
The guy behind the counter says "Sure. Do you have five thousand in cash??"
"I sure do," says Banta, plunking the money down on the counter.
At that point, two big thugs leap out of a closet, whack Banta over the head, drag his unconscious
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Billy and Joe were talking one afternoon. Billy tells Joe, "You know, I reckon I'm 'bout ready for a vacation."

He continues, "Only this year I'm gonna do it a little different. The last few years, I took your advice about where to go. Three years ago you said to go to Hawaii. I went to Hawaii and Eva got pregnant."

"Then two years ago, you told me to go to the Bahamas, and Eva got pregnant again."

"Last year you suggested Tahiti and darned if Eva didn't get pregnant again."

Joe asks Billy, "So, what you gonna do this year that's different?"

Billy says, "This year I'm taking Eva with me."
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George decides to take his boss Sam to play 9 holes on their lunch. While both men are playing excellent they are often held up by two women in front of them moving at a very slow pace.

George offers to talk to the women and see if they can speed it up a bit. He gets about 3/4ths of the way stops and jogs back. His boss asks what the problem is.

George said, "Well one of those women is my wife and the other my mistress.

Sam just shook his head at Joe and started towards the women determined to finish his round of golf.

Preparing to ask the ladies to hurry their game he too stopped short and turned around.

George asked, "What's wrong?"

Sam replies, "It's a small, small world George, and you're fired"
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