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Santa was recently hired at an office. His first task was to go out for coffee. Eager to do well his first day on the job, he grabbed a thermos and hurried to a nearby coffee shop.
Santa held up the thermos and the coffee shop worker quickly came over to take his order.
"Is this big enough to hold six cups of coffee?" Santa asked.
The coffee shop worker looked at the thermos, hesitated a few seconds, then finally replied, "Yeah. It looks like about six cups to me."
"Oh good!" Santa sighed in relief. "I'll have three regular and three black."
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A doctor warned an ageing telly star, "I think you ought to stop taking sleeping pills every night, they're habit-forming, you know."
"Don't be silly," patient said. "I'v been taking them every night now for twenty years and they haven't become a habit yet."
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Santa walks into the front door of a bar. He is obviously drunk. He staggers up to the bar, seats himself on a stool, and with a belch, asks the bartender for a drink.
The bartender politely informs the man that it appears that he has already had plenty to drink--he could not be served additional liquor at this bar but could get a taxi called for him.
Santa is briefly surprised then softly scoffs, grumbles, climbs down off the bar stool, and staggers out the front door
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This drunk gets on a bus and asks the driver how long the trip is between Limerick and Cork.
About two hours," says the conductor.
"OK," says the drunk "then how long is the trip between Cork and Limerick?"
The irate driver says to the drunk "It's still about two hours. Why'd you think there'd be a difference?"
"Well," says the drunk, "It's only a week between Christmas and New Year, but it's a long time between New Year and Christmas !"
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When Joe's wife ran away with his car, his money and his best friend, he got so depressed that his doctor sent him to see a psychiatrist.

Joe told the psychiatrist his troubles and said, "Life just isn't worth living anymore."

"Don't be stupid, Joe," said the psychiatrist. "Let your work be your salvation. I want you to totally submerge yourself in your work. Now, what do you do for a living?"

"I clean out septic tanks," Joe replied.
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Three doctors went duck hunting and a bird flew overhead.

The general practitioner looked at it and said, "Looks like a duck, flies like a duck... it's probably a duck," and he took a shot at it but missed and the bird flew away.

When the next bird came into view, the pathologist looked at it, then through the pages of a bird manual, and said, "Hummmm... white wings, yellow bill, quacking sound... might be a duck," and by the time he raised this gun to shoot, the bird was long gone.

The surgeon raised his gun and shot down a third bird almost without looking, then turned to the pathologist and said, "Go see if that was a duck."
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Sardarji Article Count: 1049

Political Article Count: 73

Women Article Count: 22

Thief Article Count: 18

Professor Article Count: 8

General Article Count: 1988

Non-Veg Jokes Article Count: 24

Kids Article Count: 413

Bollywood Article Count: 9

Doctor Patient Article Count: 289

Husband-Wife Article Count: 789

Religion Article Count: 173

Lawyers Article Count: 147

Blondes Article Count: 126

Bar Article Count: 127

Animal Kingdom Article Count: 70

Communities Article Count: 67

Sports Article Count: 80

Techies Article Count: 66

Celebrities Article Count: 42

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