In the life of a common man, things are never serious. Starting from birth until the common man dies, everything remains so so common that you can make fun of almost everything. Some of such jokes can be found here.


Two campers were aroused one night by the sounds of a huge bear tearing up their campsite. Realizing that the bear would soon make its way to their tent, they started planning their strategy. One of the campers started putting on shoes.
His buddy said "Hey, even with shoes on you ll never outrun that bear".
He replied "I don t *have* to outrun the bear, I just have to outrun *you*".
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A helicopter carrying passengers suddenly looses engine power and the aircraft begins to decent.

The pilot safely performs an emergency landing in water, and tells the passengers to remain seated and to keep the doors closed, stating that in emergency situations, the aircraft is designed to stay afloat for 30 minutes, giving rescuers time to get to them. Just then a man gets out if his seat and runs over to open the door.

The pilots screams at him, "Didn't you hear what I said, the aircraft is designed to stay afloat as long as the doors remain closed?!"

"Of course I heard you," the man replied, "but it's also designed to fly, and look how good that one worked out!!"
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ARIES: Dear God! Give me PATIENCE and I want it NOW!

TAURUS: Well, I prefer natural light if at all possible. Are you absolutely positive that lightbulb is burned out? I hate to throw it away if it still might be useful.

GEMINI: Yo God...(or is it Goddess?)...Who are you?...What are you?.....Where are You?.....How many of you ARE there? I can't figure you out!

CANCER: Dear Daddy, I know I shouldn't depend on you so much, but you're the only One
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Anti-body - - Against everyone
Artery -- The study of fine paintings
Bacteria -- The back door of a cafeteria
Barium -- What you do after CPR fails
Benign -- What you are after you be eight and before you be ten
Cardiac arrest -- Taken into custody after stealing a coupe Deville
CAT Scan -- Searching for the kitty Cardiology
Advance -- study of poker playing
Cauterize -- To make eye contact with a woman
Cesarean section -- A
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Three high steel building workers break for lunch and sit down high above the city.
First worker opens his lunch box and complains, "Not lentils and rice again today, Every day, lentils & rice, lentils & rice. If I have lentils & rice again tomorrow I will throw myself from this building."
Second worker opens his lunch box and exclaims, "Not butter chicken & rice again. Every day chicken & rice. If I have that again tomorrow I'll throw myself off too."
The last
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The artist tried to concentrate on his work, but the attraction he felt for his model finally became irresistible. He threw down his palette, took her in his arms, and kissed her.

She pushed him away. "Maybe your other models let you kiss them," she said, "but I'm not that kind!"

"Actually, I've never tried to kiss a model before," he protested.

"Really?" she said, softening. "Well, how many models have there been?"

"Four so far," he replied, thinking back. "A jug, two apples and a vase."
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