Sardarji, jokes punjabi

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Three men were applying for the same job as a detective. One was Santa, one was Jewish, and one was Italian. The chief decided to ask each applicant just one question and base his decision upon that answer.
When the Jewish man arrived for his interview, the chief asked him, "Who killed Jesus Christ?"
The Jewish man answered without hesitation "The Romans killed him."
The chief thanked him and he left. When the Italian man arrived for his interview, the chief asked
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Banta, although ordinarily eloquent, had the misfortune of stuttering badly when excited.

Once, when walking with his friend Santa down a crowded city street, he said with great excitement, "L-l-l-l-look at that g-g-g-girl. W-w-w-what a f-f-f-f-f-f-figure!"

"Where? Where?" demanded Santa, equally excited, once Jones had managed to get his message across.

"Too late," said Banta, quite calm. "She walked into a building."

A moment later, he said, "L-l-l-l-look at that c-c-c-car. N-n-n-n- never saw s-s-s-s-s----"

"Where? Where?" demanded Santa again.

"Turned the corner," said Banta briefly.

A few minutes passed and Banta began again, "L-l-l-l-l-look..."

Santa, weary of having everything over before Banta could finish, said, "It's all right. I see, I see..."

There was a brief pause and then Banta said, "If you saw it, why did you step in it?"
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Santa is sitting at the coffee shop, staring morosely into his coffee.
Banta walks in and sits down. After trying to start a conversation several times and getting only distracted grunts, he asks Santa what the problem is.
"Well," said Santa, "I ran afoul of one of those questions my wife asks. Now I'm in deep trouble at home."
"What kind of question?" asked Banta.
"My wife asked me if I would still love her if when she was old, fat and ugly."
"That's easy," said Banta. "You just say 'Of course I will!"
"Yeah," said Santa, "that's what I did, except I said 'Of course I DO.'"
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A doctor prescribed suppositories to Santa suffering from constipation but a week later he returned to the doctor and complained that the treatment wasn't working.

"Have you been taking them regularly?" asked the doctor.

"What do you think I've been doing?" snapped Santa. "Shoving them up my ass?"
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A new soldier, Banta, was on sentry duty at the main gate. His orders were clear: No car was to enter unless it had a special sticker on the windshield.
A big Army car came up with a general seated in the back.
Banta said, "Halt, who goes there?"
The sergeant, who was driving, motioned to the back seat and said, "Brigadier."
"I'm sorry, I can't let you through. You have to have a sticker on the windshield."
The Brigadier yelled from the back, "Drive on!"
Banta replied, "Hold it! You really can't come through. I have orders to shoot if you try driving in without a sticker."
The Brigadier repeated, "I'm telling you, son, drive on!"
Banta walked up to the rear window and said, "Sir, I'm new at this. Do I shoot you or your driver?"
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Santa was brought to court on charges of drunken driving. Just before the trial, there was a commotion in the gallery.
The judge pounded the gavel on his table and shouted, "Order, order."
Santa immediately responded, "Thank you , your honour, I will have a scotch and soda."
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