12 reasons why I chose Business as profession: 1. I hate sleeping. 2. I have enjoyed my life in childhood. 3. I can't Live without Tension. 4. I wanted 2 have a disturbed life. 5. I believe in Geeta "karm karo fal ki chinta mat karo". 6. I wanted 2 take revenge on myself. 7. I love dreaming about, delivery, payments, orders. 8. I like spending time with staff, customer, govt babu than family, friends. 9. I love giving bribe. 10. I love 2 work on holidays. 11. I can't live without mobile hooked on my ears even in the bathroom.
Once Santa and Banta were celebrating in a bar. A man walks into the bar and asks what the fuss is all about. Santa says: "We have just put together a 100 piece jigsaw puzzle in under six hours." The man says: "So whats the big deal. The Banta. "On the box it says from 3 to 5 years."
Two monks were returning to the monastery in the evening. It had rained and there were puddles of water on the roadsides. At one place a beautiful young woman was standing unable to walk across because of a deep puddle of water.
The elder of the two monks went up to her and lifted her in his arms, carried her over the puddle and left her on the other side of the road. Afterwards, he continued on his way to the monastery.
Taking his seat in his chambers, the judge faced the opposing lawyers, Santa and Banta. "So," he said, "I have been presented, by both of you, with a bribe." Both, Santa and Banta squirmed uncomfortably. "You, advocate Santa, gave me Rs 60,000. And you, advocate Banta, gave me Rs 50,000." The judge reached into his pocket and pulled out a check. He handed it to Santa, and stated, "Now then, I'm returning Rs 10,000, and we're going to decide this case strictly on its merits."
The husband finally wised up to the fact that his wife was less than faithful. He hired a private investigator to follow her and, in less than a week, had all the information that he needed on the 'other man.'
The husband convinced himself that his would still be a loving and trustworthy marriage had not this S.O.B. come onto the scene. Being a man of the 90s and all, he decided to handle the matter in what he judged to be a sophisticated and business-like manner.
A man walking down the street comes across two persons, in the midst of a fight. One seems to have the upper hand. He is sitting on the other belly, and with each punch he lands shouts "Chaddu ga nahin Bante!"(I won't leave you, Banta!) The person at the receiving end cries a bit and then laughs a lot. Bystander: "Bhai Sahib ro kuan rahey ho"(Brother, why are you crying?) The person below: "Dard ho rahi hai"(It is hurting) Bystander: "Phir Haans kyon rahey ho"?(Then, why are you laughing?) The person below: "Mera naam Banta nahi Santa hai"(My name is not Banta but Santa)