An English teacher spent a lot of time marking grammatical errors in her students' written work. She was not sure how much impact she was having until one overly busy day when she sat at her desk rubbing her temples.
A student asked, "What's the matter, Mrs.Sheridan?" "Tense," she replied, describing her emotional state. After a slight pause the student tried again, "What was the matter? What has been the matter? What migh thave been the matter...?
Husband: Wow, Tum itni Gulabi kaise lag rahi ho???
Wife: When your lovely words touch the bundle branches of the circulation system of my heart, it starts beating faster & increased output is trans mitted to adrenals which start secreting glucon to increase blood glucose level & to combatthis emergency, Pituitary output also increases which raises blood estrogen level, Causing vasodilation and I look PINK...
MORAL: Jyada padhi likhi biwi romance ki Mummy-Didi ek kar deti hai...
A drunk walks into a crowded bar and takes the last barstool next to an older woman. After awhile, the woman starts to smell this horrible odor coming from the direction of the drunk. She turns to him and says, "Excuse me Mister, but did you just shit yourself?" The drunk replied, "Yes ma'am, I have indeed shit myself." The woman says, "Well, why don't you go somewhere and clean yourself up?" The drunk says, "'Cos I'm not finished yet..."
An attorney was sitting in his office late one night, when the Devil appeared before him. The Devil told the lawyer, "I have a proposition for you.You can win every case you try, for the rest of your life. Your clients will adore you, your colleagues will stand in awe of you, and you will make embarrassing sums of money. All I want in exchange is your soul, your wife s soul, your children s souls, the souls of your parents, grandparents, and parents-in-law, and the souls of all of your friends and law partners." The lawyer thought about this for a moment, then asked, "So, what s the catch?"