A farmer purchased an old, run-down; abandoned farm with plans to turn it into a thriving enterprise. The fields were grown over with weeds, the farmhouse was falling apart, and the fences were broken down.

During his first day of work, the town preacher stops by to bless the man's work, saying, "May you and God work together to make this the farm of your dreams!"

A few months later, the preacher stops by again to call on the farmer. Low and behold, it's
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Judge: Kya naam hai tumhaara?

Mulzim: Huzoor, Ram Lal.

Judge: Tum ne 10 saal se apni wife ko dabaa ke, daraa ke, dhamka ke, apne control mein rakha hai.

Mulzim: Judge sahab vo aisa hai ki...

Judge: Khamosh!!! Main safaai nahin maang raha hun; tarika bata tarika!!!!
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Two women were paired together as partners in a club tournament and met on the putting green for the first time.

After introductions, the first golfer asked, "What's your handicap?"

"Oh, I'm a scratch golfer," the other replied.

"Really!" exclaimed the first woman, suitably impressed that she was paired up with her.

"Yes, I write down all my good scores and scratch out the bad ones!
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Sister Mary Katherine lived in a convent, a block away from Jack's liquor store.

One day, in walked Sister Mary Katherine and said, "Oh Jack, give me pint of the brandy."

"Sister Mary Katherine,' exclaimed Jack, 'I could never do that! I've never sold alcohol to a nun in my life!"

"Oh jack," she responded, "it's only for the Mother Superior." Her voice dropped. "It helps her constipation, you know."

So, Jack sold her the brandy. Latter
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A wife says to her husband one weekend morning, "We've got such a clever dog. He brings in the daily newspapers every morning."

Her husband replied, "Well, lots of dogs can do that."

The wife responded, " But we've never subscribed to any papers!"
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A man walks into a bar and notices a poker game at the far table. Upon taking a closer look he sees a dog sitting at the table.

This peaks his curiosity and he walks closer and sees cards and chips in front of the dog. Then the next hand is dealt and cards are dealt to the dog.

Then the dog acts in turn with all the other players, calling, raising, discarding, everything the other human players were doing.

However none of the other players seemed
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