Two salesmen were writing up their orders when the conversation came around to last night's big date.
"So how'd it go, Joe?" asked Bill.
"Terrible," admitted Joe. "The moment we got back to her place the phone started ringing. There must have been fifteen calls from guys wanting to ask her out. It never stopped, and we never even got started."
Bill tried to comfort him, "It could have been worse, Joe. After all, an attractive young woman's allowed to have her number in the phone book, now isn't she?"
"Yeah," Joe replied, "but not in the Yellow Pages!"
Pamela, the church gossip and self-appointed supervisor of the church's morals, kept sticking her nose into other people's business. Several residents were unappreciative of her activities, but feared her enough to maintain their silence.
She made a mistake, however, when she accused Tony, a new member, of being an alcoholic after she saw his pickup truck parked in front of the town's only bar one afternoon.
She commented to Tony and others that everyone seeing it there would know that he was an alcoholic.
Tony, a man of few words, stared at her for a moment and just walked away. He said nothing.
Later that evening, Tony quietly parked his pickup in front of Pamela's house..........and he left it there all night!
Ever notice how a 4-year-old's voice is louder than 200 adults ?
Several years ago, I returned home from a trip just when a storm hit, with crashing thunder and severe lightning. As I came into my bedroom about 2 a.m., I found my two children in bed with my wife, Karey, apparently scared by the loud storm. I resigned myself to sleep in the guest bedroom that night.
The next day, I talked to the children and explained that it was OK to sleep with Mom when
When KFC sales hit a lean patch, Colonel Sanders came up with a brilliant advertising idea.
He got in touch with the Pope and asked the pontiff whether he could change the words of the Lord's Prayer from "Give us this day a daily bread" to "Give us this day a daily chicken."
"I can't possibly do that," said the Pope.
"Not even for 100,000 dollars?" asked the Colonel.
Banta was driving down a quiet country lane when out into the road strayed a rooster. Smack! The rooster disappeared under the car and up floated a cloud of feathers. Shaken, Banta pulled over at the farmhouse, rang the doorbell. A farmer appeared. Banta, somewhat nervously said, "I think I killed your rooster. Please allow me to replace him." "Suit yourself," the farmer replied, "you can go join the other chickens that are around the back."
Bobby walks into a bar and says, "Bartender, one round for everyone, on me!"
The bartender says, "Well, seems you're in a really good mood tonight, hmm?"
Bobby says, "Oh, you can bet on it! I just got hired by the city to go around and remove all the money from parking meters. I start on Monday!"
The bartender congratulates him and proceeds to pour the round.
Monday evening arrives and Bobby comes back into the bar and says, "Bartender, TWO rounds for everyone, on me!"
The bartender says, "Well now! If you're so happy just over having this new job, I can just imagine how happy you'll be when you get your paycheck!"
Bobby looks at the bartender with a wondrous look on his face, pulls out a handful of quarters from his pocket, and says, "You mean they'll PAY me too?"