Old Farmer Johnson was dying. The family was standing around his bed.

With a low voice he said to his wife, "When I'm dead I want you to marry farmer Jones."

Wife, "No, I can't marry anyone after you."

Johnson, "But I want you to."

Wife, "But why?"

Johnson, "Jones once cheated me in a horse deal!"
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A preacher was making his rounds on a bicycle, when he came upon a little boy trying to sell a lawn mower.

"How much do you want for the mower?" asked the preacher.

"I just want enough money to go out and buy me a bicycle." said the little boy.

After a moment of consideration, the preacher asked, "Will you take my bike in trade for it?"

The little boy asked if he could try it out first. He told the preacher he hadn't ridden a bicycle
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Think you are sitting in front of computer, what computer will think...??
Do you know...??
Intel inside, mental outside...!!!

Wait don't laugh, joke is not over...
You are standing in front of fridge...What fridge will think...
Do you know...??
Cool inside, fool outside!!!

Wait one more for you...

Think you are standing outside race course...
What race course will think...
Do you know...??
Ghoda inside, Gadha outside...!!!
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At the height of a political corruption trial, the prosecuting attorney attacked a witness.

"Isn't it true," he bellowed, "that you accepted five thousand dollars to compromise this case?"

The witness stared out the window as though he hadn't hear the question.

"Isn't it true that you accepted five thousand dollars to compromise this case?" the lawyer repeated.

The witness still did not respond.

Finally, the judge leaned over and said, "Sir, please answer the question."

"Oh," the startled witness said, "I thought he was talking to you."
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A pipe burst in a doctor's house. He called a plumber.

The plumber arrived, unpacked his tools, did some mysterious plumber-type things for a while, and handed the doctor a bill for $600.

The doctor exclaimed, "This is ridiculous, I don't even make this much money!"

The plumber replied, "Neither did I when I was a doctor".
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The young man was on his first date with the gorgeous young woman and decided to impress her with his abilities in wine tasting.

He told the wine steward to bring a bottle of 1985 Sterling Cabernet Sauvignon from their Carneros district vineyard.

Upon tasting the wine, the young man scolded the wine steward, "This is obviously a 1987 vintage from their N. Coast vineyards near Calistoga, please bring me what I ordered."

As the second bottle was
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