Little Johnny blows up a balloon and starts flicking it all around the house with his finger. His mother tells him to stop it as he's liable to break something, but he continues.
"Johnny!" Mom screams. "Knock it off. You're going to break something."
He stops and eventually Mom leaves for a short trip to the shopping center. Little Johnny starts up with the balloon again after his mom has left for the store. He gives it one last flick and it lands in the
Two small county judges both got arrested for speeding on the same day. Rather than call the state Supreme Court for a visiting judge, each agreed to hear the other's case.
The first judge took the bench while the second stood at the defendant's table, and admitted his guilt. The sentencing judge immediately suspended both the fine and costs.
They switched places. The second judge admitted that he was speeding, too. Thereupon the first judge immediately fined him $250 and ordered him to pay court costs.
The second judge was furious. "I suspended your fine and costs, but you threw the book at me!" he fumed.
The first judge looked at him and replied, "This is the second such case we've had in here today. Someone has to get tough about all this speeding!"
Mulla Nasruddin and his wife went to Israel for their holidays, and visited a night club in Tel Aviv. A comedian was on the bill who did his whole act in Hebrew. Nasruddin's wife sat through the comic's act in silence, but Nasruddin roared with laughter at the end of each joke.
"I didn't know you understood Hebrew," she said to the Mulla when the comedian had concluded his act.
"I don't" replied Nasruddin.
"Well, how come you laughed so much at his jokes?"