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An elderly man was sick and in the hospital. There was this one nurse who drove him crazy because every time she came in, she would talk to him like he was a little child.

She would say in a patronizing voice, "And how are we doing this morning?" or "Are we ready for a bath?"

The man had just had enough! So, one morning at breakfast, he took the apple juice off the tray and put it on his bedside stand. Later that morning, he was given a urine bottle to fill
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Jeeto complained to her friend Preeto

"She told me that you told her the secret I told you not to tell her."

"Well," replied Preeto in a hurt tone, "I told her not to tell you I told her."

"Oh dear!" sighed Jeeto. "Well, don't tell her I told you that she told me."
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Aboard a flight from L.A. to New York, Grandma Esther was taking her very first flight.

They had only been aloft a few minutes when the elderly lady complained to the stewardess that her ears were popping.

The girl smiled and gave the older woman some chewing gum, assuring her that many people experienced the same discomfort.

When they landed in New York, Grandma thanked the stewardess.

"The chewing gum worked fine," she said, "but tell me, how do I get it out of my ears?"
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God was sitting in heaven one day when a scientist said to Him, "God, we don't need you anymore. Science has finally figured out a way to create life out of nothing - in other words, we can now do what you did in the beginning."

"Oh, is that so? Tell Me..." replies God.

"Well," says the scientist, "we can take dirt and form it into the likeness of you and breathe life into it, thus creating man."

"Well, that's very interesting...show Me."

So the scientist bends down to the earth and starts to mold the soil into the shape of a man.

"No, no, no..." interrupts God, "Get your own dirt."
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A newlywed sailor is informed by the navy that hes going to be stationed a long way from home on a remote island in the South Pacific for 2 years. A few weeks after he gets there he really starts to miss his new wife, so he writes her a letter.
"My darling," he writes, "it looks like were going to be apart for a very long time. Already Im starting to miss you and were constantly surrounded by young, attractive native girls. The temptations terrible. I need some kind of hobby
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A guy phones a law firm and says, "I want to speak to my lawyer."
The receptionist says, "Im sorry, but your lawyer died last week."
The next day the same guy phones the law firm and says, "I want to speak to my lawyer."
Once again the receptionist replies, "Im sorry, but your lawyer died last week."
The next day the guy makes his regular call to the law firm and say, "I want to speak to my lawyer."
"Excuse me sir," the receptionist says, "but this is third time Ive had to tell you that your lawyer died last week. Why do you keep calling?"
The guy replies, "Because I love hearing it!"
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Sardarji Article Count: 1049

Political Article Count: 73

Women Article Count: 22

Thief Article Count: 18

Professor Article Count: 8

General Article Count: 1988

Non-Veg Jokes Article Count: 24

Kids Article Count: 413

Bollywood Article Count: 9

Doctor Patient Article Count: 289

Husband-Wife Article Count: 789

Religion Article Count: 173

Lawyers Article Count: 147

Blondes Article Count: 126

Bar Article Count: 127

Animal Kingdom Article Count: 70

Communities Article Count: 67

Sports Article Count: 80

Techies Article Count: 66

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