1. Someone on his status "Sleeping" since 3 Days! He's Probably dead.
2. Someone is "Driving" since 5 days! I guess he reached Dubai!!!
3. Someone's status is "Happy" since 1 Month. Living in Paradise???
4. Someone is always 'Available'. How free Are you?????
5. From first day their status is, 'Hey there! I'm using WhatsApp' I Know ! That's why you're on my list!
6. Someone writes "urgent calls only". Don't get it... Are you in the police or ambulance service?
7. Someone says, "Can't talk. Whatsapp only". Dude then throw away your phone.. You are not using the phone's Primary function 8. Someone is 'at d movies' for the past 6 weeks. Either he owns d theatre or sells popcorn there....
Did you hear that Google is now offering free email accounts that are 500 times bigger than Yahoo's or MSN's accounts?
Yep, but there is a catch: Google plans on reading your mail and then delivering ads based upon the content of the email.
So if your wife sends you a note saying, "If you don't figure out a way to get your dick hard, then I'm going to be forced to bone Santos our pool boy."
Then Google will include three ads in her message: First for Viagra to offer help for your problematic erectile dysfunction. Second for Purina dog food to help build healthy bones. and to satisfy the most important need - a local pool service.
A poor, downtrodden beggar stands on the street, not having much luck. Exasperated and hungry he decides to make a sign, and hastily scrawls the word "Beg" on a piece of cardboard. Hardly anyone pays him and his new sign any mind. A few passers-by drop him a couple of pennies. Suddenly, he gets an idea. He picks up his sign and to the word "Beg," he adds ".com." From around the corner, two venture capitalists appear, tripping over themselves to be the first to hand him a quarter of a million dollars. Pleased with his new-found wealth, the beggar decides to go one better. Flipping his cardboard sign over, he writes "e-Beg." Immediately, Jerry Yang and Bill Gates pull up in limousines and ask to buy him out.
My friend Nancy and I decided to introduce her elderly mother to the magic of the Internet. Our first move was to access Google, and we told her it could answer any question she had.
Nancy's mother was very skeptical until Nancy said, "It's true, Mom."
"Think of something to ask it."
As I sat with fingers poised over the keyboard, Nancy's mother thought a minute, then responded, "How is Aunt Helen feeling?"
There was once a young man who, in his youth, professed his desire to become a great writer.
When asked to define "great" he said, "I want to write stuff that the whole world will read, stuff that people will react to on a truly emotional level, stuff that will make them scream, cry, howl in pain and anger!"
He now writes error messages for Microsoft Corporation.