Jokes on the relationship of husband and wife are more hilarious. Here are some of such jokes that can get you turned on in case you are getting bored.


A guy dials his home phone from work. A strange woman answers.

The guy says, "Who is this?"

"This is the maid," answered the woman.

"We don't have a maid!"

"I was just hired this morning by the lady of the house."

"Well, this is her husband. Is she there?"

"Um...she's upstairs in the bedroom with someone who I just figured was her husband."

The guy is fuming. He says to the maid, "Listen, would you like
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A married man was visiting his girlfriend when she requested that he shave his beard.

"Oh James, I like your beard, but I would really love to see your handsome face."

James replied, "My wife loves this beard. I couldn't possibly do it. She would kill me!!"

"Oh please?" the girlfriend asked again, in a sexy little voice.

"Really, I can't," he replied. "My wife loves this beard!!"

The girlfriend asked once more, he sighed and finally gave in.

That night James crawled into bed next to his wife while she was sleeping.

The wife was awakened, turned toward him, felt his face and said, "Oh Michael, you shouldn't be here. My husband will be home soon!"
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Husband: Mom, called me and she is coming tomorrow, her train will reach by 4 O' Clock.

Wife: What! She came just 4 months back, right? Why is she coming now? Tomorrow is Sunday, I thought of getting up late, but your mom had to come on a Sunday itself and that too morning 4:00 o'clock. Where will she get an auto at that time? I will not make any warm breakfast, she will have to do with biscuits and bread. The kids will also not go to play, as she spoils them by getting
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A retired couple is lying in bed one night and are discussing all aspects of their future.

"What will you do if I die before you do?" husband asked wife.

After some thought, she said, "I'd probably look for a house sharing situation with three other single or widowed women who might be a little younger than herself, since she is so active for her age."

Then wife asked husband, "What will you do if I die first?"

He replied, "Probably the same thing."
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Two friends met after a long time...

Hey, I got married!

Oh! Thats good!

No, that's bad. She's ugly!

Oh! That's Bad!

No, that's Good. She's rich!

Oh! That's good!

No, that's bad ! She won't give me a cent...

Oh! That's bad!

No, that's Good! She bought me a big house!

Oh! That's good.

No, that's bad! The house burnt down!

Oh! That's bad!

No, that's good! She was inside...!
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Harry and Sheila were having dinner in a very fine restaurant. Their waitress, taking another order at a table a few paces away noticed that Harry was ever so slowly, silently sliding down his chair and under the table, while Sheila acted quite unconcerned.

Their waitress watched as Harry slid all the way down his chair and out of sight under the table.

Still, Sheila appeared calm and unruffled, apparently unaware that Harry had disappeared under the table.

After the waitress finished taking the order, she came over to the table and said to the woman, "Pardon me, ma'am, but I think your husband just slid under the table."

Sheila calmly looked up at her and replied firmly, "Oh, no he didn't. In fact, my husband just walked in the front door."
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