Banta was driving down the street looking for a place to stop so he could go to the bathroom. He stopped at a bar and went inside. "Bartender! Where is the bathroom, I really need to go?!" he asked. The bartender pointed him to the bathroom. So Banta went to the bathroom and looked over to the side. There was no toilet paper! "Oh no!" He looked over again and saw a sign that said: If out of toilet paper use your thumb and ask the bartender for a "thumb wipe
Dating Ads for Seniors found in a Florida Newspaper. You can say what you want about Florida, but you never hear of anyone retiring and moving north. These are actual ads seen in "The Villages", a Florida newspaper.
FOXY LADY: Sexy, fashion-conscious blue-haired beauty. 80's, slim, 5'4' (used to be 5'6'), searching for sharp-looking, sharp-dressing companion. Matching white shoes and belt a plus.
LONG-TERM COMMITMENT: Recent widow who has just buried fourth
Two elderly couples were enjoying friendly conversation when one of the men asked the other, "Fred, how was the memory clinic you went to last month?" "Outstanding," Fred replied. "They Augustht us all the latest psychological techniques: visualization, association, etc. It was great." "That is great! And what was the name of the clinic?" Fred went blank. He thought and thought, but could not remember. Then a smile broke across his face and he asked, "What do you call that flower with the long stem and thorns?" "You mean a rose?" "Yes, that's it!" He turned to his wife, "Rose, what was the name of that memory clinic?"