Banta had been driving all night and by morning was still far from his destination. He decided to stop at the next city he came to, and park somewhere quiet so he could get an hour or two of sleep. As luck would have it, the quiet place he chose happened to be on one of the city's major jogging routes. No sooner had he settled back to snooze when there came a knocking on his window. He looked out and saw a jogger running in place. "Yes?" "Excuse me, sir," the
A guy walks into the vet's office with a hamster. He lays the hamster on the table and the doctor says, "I'm sorry, sir, but your hamster is dead." "I want a second opinion!" the man demands. So the doctor brings in a cat. The cat walks around the hamster, sniffs him and shakes its head. "Well the cat says your hamster is dead," says the doctor. "Well I want a third opinion." So the doctor brings in a Labrador retriever. The lab walks around the hamster, sniffs him and shakes its head. "The lab says your hamster is dead." "OK, fine. What do I owe you?" "$650" the doctor said. "What?!? What for?" "Well, you owe me $50, but the other $600 is for the cat scan and the lab test."
A middle-aged couple had finally learned how to send and receive texts on their cell phones. The wife, being a romantic at heart, decided one day that she'd send her husband a text while she was out of the house having coffee with a friend.
She texted: If you are sleeping, send me your dreams. If you are laughing, send me your smile. If you are eating, send me a bite. If you are drinking, send me a sip. If you are crying, send me your tears. I love you.
The husband, being a no-nonsense sort of guy, texted back: I'm on the toilet. Please advise.
A minister waited in line to have his car filled with gas just before a long holiday weekend.
The attendant worked quickly, but there were many cars ahead of him in front of the service station. Finally, the attendant motioned him toward a vacant pump.
"Sorry about the delay. It seems as if everyone waits until the last minute to get ready for a long trip."
The minister chuckled, "I know what you mean. It's the same in my business."
There was a large group of frinds on Whatsapp. There were around 40 to 50 pepole in that group.... Conversation: Member A: Happy Birthday Tina....
Other members: 1. Happy b'dy Tina... 2. Happy Birthdy tina... 3. Many many happy return of the day Tina! 4. Jamandin Mubarak Ho Tina... 5. Party Kab Raho Ho Yaar Tina? 6. Happy Birthday Tina.... 7. Happy Bday, Jamandin Mubarak Ho Yaar.
Member A: SORRY! SENT BY MISTAKE. TINA IS IN OTHER GROUP!!!
Ek din Santa office jaane ke liye bus mein chada toh conductor ne haste hua pucha, "Sir, kal raat theek-thaak ghar pahunch gaye the aap? Kahin gire toh nahin, ya ghar ka raasta toh nahin bhule ghar ka?"