A Chinese decides to retire and move to USA after 50 years of living in Shanghai.
He bought a home on a small piece of land. A few days after moving in. The friendly American neighbor decides to go across and welcome the new guy to the region. He goes next door but on his way up the drive-way he sees the Chinese running around his front yard chasing about 10 hens. Not wanting to interrupt these 'Chinese customs', he decides to put the welcome on hold for the day.
A new business was opening and one of the owner's friends sent flowers for the occasion. They arrived at the new business site and the owner read the card. It said, "Rest in Peace." The owner told the friend that had sent them and the friend called the florist to complain. After he told the florist of the obvious mistake and how angry he was, the florist said, "Sir I am really sorry for the mistake", and added, "boy we are in trouble with some funeral home. Imagine-somewhere there is a funeral-taking place today, and they have flowers with your card saying, "Congratulations on your new location."
Santa goes out one day and buys a brand new stud rooster for his chicken. The cocky young rooster walks over to the old rooster and says: "OK, old fellow, time to retire." The old rooster says: "You can't handle all these chickens, look what it did to me!" The young rooster replies: "Now don't give me a hassle about this old man. It's time for the old to step aside and the young take over, so take a hike!" The old rooster says: "Aw, c'mon, just let me have