Sardarji, jokes punjabi

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One day Santa went to an auction. While there, he bid on an exotic parrot. He really wanted this bird, so he got caught up in the bidding. Santa kept on bidding, but kept getting outbid, so he bid higher and higher and higher. Finally, after he bid way more than he intended, he won the bid - the fine bird was finally his!
As he was paying for the parrot, he said to the Auctioneer, "I sure hope this parrot can talk. I would hate to have paid this much for it, only to find out that he can't talk!"
"Don't worry", said the Auctioneer, "He can talk. Who do you think kept bidding against you?"
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Santa left work early one Friday, but instead of going home, he spent the weekend partying with the boys. When he finally returned home on Sunday night, his wife, Jeeto, really got on his case and stayed on it.

After a few of hours of swearing and screaming, his wife paused and pointed at him and made him an offer, "How would you like it if you didn't see me for a couple of days?"

The husband couldn't believe his luck, so he looked up, smiled and said, "That would suit me just fine!!"

Monday went by, and the man didn't see his wife. Tuesday and Wednesday went by and he still didn't see her.

Come Thursday, the swelling went down a bit and he could see her a little out of the corner of his left eye.
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Banta was visiting Delhi for the first time. He wanted to see the Palika Bazaar. Unfortunately, he couldn't find it, so he asked a police officer for directions, "Excuse me, officer, how do I get to the Palika Bazaar?"
The officer replied, "Wait here at this bus stop for the number 54 bus. It'll take you right there."
Banta thanked the officer and he drives off. Three hours later the police officer returned to the same area and, sure enough, Banta is still waiting at the same bus stop.
The officer got out of his car and said, "Excuse me, but to get to the Palika Bazaar, I said to wait here for the number 54 bus. That was three hours ago. Why are you still waiting?"
Banta replied, "Don't worry, officer, it won't be long now. The 45th bus just went by!"
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Santa was not the brightest guy around. Every day, when he walked home from work, he would get stopped by three nasty men and they would beat him up and steal his money.
Finally, Santa decided that it would serve his best interest to walk a different route, but also take some self-defense classes so this wouldn't happen again.
So Santa joined a karate class and soon was doing very well with it.
One day, on the way home from work, Santa confidently decided to take
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Banta's wife Preeto went to her doctor to see what could be done about her constipation
"It's terrible," she said, "I haven't moved my bowels in a week."
"I see. Have you done anything about it?" asked the doctor.
"Naturally," Preeto replied, "I sit in the bathroom for a half-hour in the morning and again at night."
"No," the doctor said, "I mean do you take anything?"
"Naturally," Preeto answered, "I take a newspaper."
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Santa: I am in big trouble!

Banta: What happened?

Santa: I saw a rat in my house!

Banta: Oh, well, all you need to do is use a trap.

Santa: I don't have one.

Banta: Well then, buy one.

Santa: I can't afford one.

Banta: I can give you mine if you want.

Santa: That sounds good.

Banta: All you need to do is just use some cheese in order to make the rat come to the trap.

Santa
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